Nathan called two days later.
He had reviewed the latest financial information and wanted to discuss the questions Aaron's attorneys had raised.
I sat down at the kitchen table with my notebook.
The legal documents were arranged beside me.
My coffee had begun to cool, but I didn't notice until Nathan asked whether I was still there.
"Yes. I'm listening."
He explained that Aaron's side wanted further clarification about the assets identified in the proposed settlement.
The questions were not unusual.
They needed to understand the records before deciding how to respond.
I told him I was prepared to provide the relevant information.
"Good," he said. "We'll answer what needs to be answered and avoid speculation."
That suited me.
I wanted the process to remain factual.
I didn't want my anger to determine the terms of the divorce.
I also didn't want the desire to finish quickly to make me careless.
Nathan asked whether I had heard anything directly from Aaron.
"Only messages asking to speak."
"Have you responded?"
"No."
"That's fine for now. Let me handle the formal communications."
I thanked him.
After the call, I reviewed the documents again.
The property in Marblehead had been transferred to me before the wedding.
My investment accounts had their own statements.
The interest my grandfather had left me had not been mixed with marital funds.
I had no reason to change my position.
I also understood that the records needed to speak for themselves.
I didn't need to make the investment sound more valuable than it was.
I didn't need to hide it, either.
It was part of my financial life.
That afternoon, I received a call from Aaron's sister.
I almost let it go unanswered.
Then I decided to hear what she wanted.
She sounded tense.
"Are you really going to do this?"
I knew what she meant.
"Yes."
"You've made things very difficult for Aaron."
I looked at the window above the sink.
"I didn't make the problems in our marriage by deciding to leave."
She fell silent.
Then she said that I could have handled the situation privately.
I didn't deny it.
"I could have chosen a different way to announce my decision."
"Then why didn't you?"
I thought about the fifth night.
I thought about the hours I had spent waiting for Aaron to come home.
I thought about the times I had asked about Jasmine and been made to feel unreasonable.
"I was angry, and I wanted people to stop pretending that everything was fine."
My answer surprised even me.
It wasn't the whole story.
But it was honest.
His sister said that the message had embarrassed the family.
I understood that.
I also understood that embarrassment was not the only consequence of the marriage ending.
She asked whether I intended to make claims against Aaron's family.
"No."
"Then what do you want?"
"My own property, my own assets, and a fair resolution of the joint matters."
She seemed unconvinced.
I could hear it in the pause that followed.
I didn't try to convince her.
We ended the call without resolving anything.
I sat at the table for a few minutes afterward.
I had wanted her to understand.
That was an old habit.
I wanted people to see my reasons so clearly that they would stop being disappointed in me.
But I couldn't control whether she understood.
I could only tell the truth as I knew it.
When I spoke to Nathan later, I told him about the call.
He reminded me that questions about the settlement should go through him.
I agreed.
I wasn't going to discuss the details with Aaron's relatives.
The legal work was already complicated enough without adding family arguments to it.
That evening, my father found me looking at the old notebook.
"Still writing?"
"A little."
He pulled out a chair.
"What are you writing about?"
"Things I want to do."
He smiled.
"That's good."
I looked at him.
"Do you think I waited too long?"
He didn't answer immediately.
"To leave?"
I nodded.
He considered the question.
"I think you hoped the marriage would improve."
"Yes."
"And I think you kept trying because you loved him."
I looked down.
He continued gently.
"But you don't have to keep trying forever."
I felt my throat tighten.
I had been waiting for someone to say that without turning it into a judgment.
My father reached across the table and rested his hand beside mine.
"You can regret parts of how things happened without regretting that you finally made a decision."
I wiped my eyes.
"That's what I'm trying to learn."
He nodded.
Then he stood up and returned to the kitchen.
He didn't tell me what to do next.
He trusted me to decide.
The next morning, Nathan sent an update confirming that he was continuing to review the settlement issues.
There was still work ahead.
I read the message and put my phone away.
I didn't need to check it every few minutes.
I had begun to understand that waiting for a legal response was different from waiting for Aaron to come home.
One was part of a process with steps and documents.
The other had become a habit built around uncertainty.
I could be patient with the process without returning to the habit.
That afternoon, I visited Marblehead again with my mother.
We walked through the rooms slowly.
She opened the curtains in the living room.
I stood by the window and watched the water.
I imagined living there again.
I imagined making changes to the rooms.
I imagined leaving everything as it was for a while.
None of the possibilities felt urgent.
For the first time, that didn't bother me.
I had spent years thinking that every decision needed to be made before someone else became impatient.
Now I was learning that my life could wait for me to catch up with it.
Click here to continue reading: PART 15: I Had Expected the Divorce to Take Away My Future, but the Quiet Days Began Showing Me How Much of It Was Still Mine
The Fifth Night Changed Everything, but the Message I Sent Before Dawn Was Only the Beginning of My Decision
Part 14 of 20
