I remained beside the sink for several seconds.
The water tap was dripping.
One drop.
Then another.
I had always hated that sound, but I had never bothered to repair it.
That evening, it seemed louder than the kitchen clock.
Luke was still sitting at the table.
I could feel him watching me.
"Mom, come back."
I closed my eyes briefly.
Then I turned around.
He pointed toward the document.
"Please read the rest."
I returned to my chair.
The paper was still where I had left it.
I picked it up again.
This time, I forced myself to read every visible line.
There were names.
Dates.
Several printed sections.
A space for a signature.
And a reference number.
I looked at the date again.
My mind went back to a small hospital room.
A white curtain.
A plastic chair.
A nurse asking me questions while I tried not to cry.
I hadn't thought about that day in years.
Or perhaps I had.
Perhaps I had simply become very good at pushing it away.
"Mom?"
I looked at Luke.
"Yes?"
"Do you know what this is?"
I hesitated.
"I know what kind of document it appears to be."
"Then tell me."
I placed it down.
"Luke, there are some things about the past that are difficult to explain."
He gave a small shake of his head.
"That's what you keep saying."
"I know."
"But I need an answer."
I couldn't blame him.
He was eighteen.
He had spent his entire life believing he knew where he came from.
He had grown up with family photographs on the walls.
He knew the stories about his first birthday.
He knew which hospital he had been born in.
He knew the name of the doctor who had delivered him because I had mentioned it more than once.
At least, I thought he knew.
Now a single document had made him question all of it.
I looked at him.
"Did Ben tell you something specific about your birth?"
Luke nodded.
"Yes."
My stomach tightened.
"What?"
"He said the story you told me wasn't complete."
I felt my lips part.
He continued.
"He said the date on the paper was important."
I looked down again.
The date was familiar because I had spent years remembering it.
Not every day.
Not every month.
But whenever something reminded me of that period, it returned.
I had once believed that time would make certain memories easier.
It hadn't.
I just learned how to live around them.
"Luke, why didn't you come straight home when you found it?"
He looked away.
"Because I wanted to be sure."
"Sure of what?"
"That Ben wasn't trying to hurt you."
I stared at him.
He continued.
"I know how much you trust him."
That hurt more than I expected.
"Did you think I would be angry with him?"
"I didn't know what to think."
He rubbed his eyes.
"He said if I came home and asked you directly, you might deny everything."
I felt my chest tighten.
"Did he say I would lie?"
Luke didn't answer.
That was answer enough.
I looked at the document.
"Did he tell you where his parents got it?"
"He said it had been in their possession for years."
"Did he know what was written on it?"
"I think so."
"You think so?"
Luke nodded.
"He recognized the number."
I leaned forward.
"What number?"
He pointed to a small section near the bottom.
I followed his finger.
There it was.
A reference number.
I didn't know why I had overlooked it before.
I stared at it.
Then I felt my hands become cold.
I had seen that number somewhere.
I couldn't immediately remember where.
But it wasn't unfamiliar.
I searched my memory.
A folder.
A telephone conversation.
A meeting.
Then something came back to me.
A document I had once kept in a drawer.
A document I had moved several times whenever I changed houses.
I looked at Luke.
"Did Ben say anything about his mother?"
He nodded.
"He said she knew more than his father."
I frowned.
"About this?"
"Yes."
"Did he tell you why?"
"He said she had been there."
I stopped.
"What?"
Luke looked at me.
"That's what he said."
I couldn't speak.
The kitchen seemed to move around me.
I gripped the edge of the table.
"His mother was there?"
Luke nodded.
"He wouldn't explain it properly."
I looked toward the hallway.
Diane.
I remembered her standing beside me at a family gathering.
I remembered her asking how Luke was doing at school.
I remembered her bringing a birthday cake when he turned ten.
I remembered her taking photographs of the boys together.
Had she been looking at Luke differently all those years?
Had she known something I didn't?
Or had she known something I had tried to forget?
"Mom, what happened?"
I looked at my son.
He was no longer crying.
That worried me even more.
His expression had become still.
He looked like someone waiting for a difficult answer.
I tried to choose my words carefully.
"When you were very young, there were some complicated circumstances."
Luke stared at me.
"What circumstances?"
"I was going through a difficult time."
"That doesn't answer my question."
"I know."
He shook his head.
"Did something happen when I was born?"
I looked at the document.
Then I looked at him.
I wanted to say no.
I wanted to tell him that everything was exactly as he had always believed.
But I couldn't make the words come out.
Luke slowly pushed his chair backward.
"So it's true."
I reached for his hand.
"Luke, please sit down."
He didn't move.
"Did you know Ben had this?"
"No."
"Did you know his parents had it?"
I hesitated.
"I don't know."
He looked at me with disbelief.
"You don't know?"
I shook my head.
"Not everything."
That was the first time I had admitted there might be something I couldn't explain.
Luke looked down.
For a moment, he seemed almost relieved.
Then he spoke again.
"Mom, there's something else."
I felt my heart sink.
"What?"
"Ben said I should ask you one question."
I waited.
He took a breath.
"Who was with you at the hospital when I was born?"
I stared at him.
The question seemed simple.
But it reached somewhere I had kept closed for a very long time.
I looked at the document once more.
Then I realized that the answer might not be as straightforward as the story I had told him growing up.
Click here to continue reading: PART 4: One Question About the Day My Son Was Born Forced Me to Face a Memory I Had Tried to Leave Behind
My Son Had Barely Been Gone Two Days When He Returned With a Secret That Changed Everything I Thought I Knew
Part 3 of 20
