Cindy stood near the bottom of the porch steps.
Her arms were still crossed.
She looked at Josh as if she were waiting for him to take back what he had said.
Then she turned toward me.
"So you really spent the money?"
I nodded.
She let out a short breath.
"That was supposed to be my birthday present."
Josh answered quietly.
"We know."
Cindy looked at him again.
"I've been telling people about that trip."
"I know, Mom."
"People have been asking me when we're going."
Josh lowered his eyes for a moment.
I could tell he didn't enjoy hearing that.
But he didn't change his answer.
Cindy shook her head.
"I can't believe you would do this without telling me."
I wanted to remind her that it had been our savings.
We had earned the money.
We had put it away every month.
It wasn't money she had given us.
But Josh spoke first.
"We made the decision together."
She looked at me.
"So this was your idea?"
I felt my face grow warm.
I could have explained everything again.
I could have told her about the phone call to the audiologist.
The expired warranty.
The replacement cost.
The hours we had spent trying to find the hearing aids in the pond.
But I realized she already knew enough.
She knew Dad had lost them.
She knew they had been expensive.
And she knew we had replaced them.
The problem was that she had expected us to keep the cruise money untouched.
I answered honestly.
"Yes. I suggested using it for Dad."
Cindy looked offended.
"Why couldn't you wait?"
I stared at her.
"Wait for what?"
"Maybe we could have figured something out."
Josh shook his head.
"Mom, he needed them."
She raised her voice slightly.
"People manage without hearing aids."
I felt something inside me tighten.
Dad had managed for days.
He had struggled through conversations.
He had been unable to hear ordinary sounds.
He had worried about being a burden.
I remembered him sitting at his kitchen table, trying to understand what I was saying.
I remembered how he had touched the empty spaces behind his ears.
I didn't want him to go through that again.
Josh looked at his mother.
"That doesn't mean he should have to."
Cindy looked away.
For a moment, nobody spoke.
Then she asked whether the new devices had really cost that much.
I told her the total.
She frowned.
"Four thousand three hundred dollars?"
I nodded.
She looked at Josh.
"You could have gotten cheaper ones."
Josh's expression hardened.
"We bought what the audiologist recommended."
Cindy shook her head.
I could see she was still thinking about the cruise.
Not the pond.
Not Dad.
The trip.
I had expected disappointment.
I hadn't expected it to be the only thing she wanted to discuss.
Josh took another breath.
"Mom, I need you to understand that what happened wasn't funny."
Cindy looked at him.
"I already said I was sorry."
I hadn't heard her say that.
Not at the pond.
Not afterward.
Not when Dad was sitting under the tree in wet clothes.
But I didn't interrupt.
Josh waited.
Then he said something that made me look at him.
"You need to take responsibility for pushing him."
Cindy's face changed.
She seemed surprised that he was speaking so directly.
She glanced toward the porch.
Then back at him.
"I wasn't trying to hurt him."
Josh nodded.
"Maybe you weren't."
That answer seemed to catch her off guard.
He continued.
"But he got hurt anyway."
I watched her carefully.
She had no paper plate now.
No crowd of relatives around her.
No one was laughing.
It was just the three of us in her front yard.
And there was nowhere to hide the truth behind a joke.
Click here to continue reading: PART 10: The Cruise Had Been Her Favorite Topic for Months, but My Husband Finally Asked Her to Remember What Happened Beside the Pond
The Afternoon Everyone Watched My Father Fall Into the Water, and Nobody Knew What to Say
Part 9 of 20
